What is ‘Mum Guilt’ and why do we feel it?

 

Mum guilt is a term that most mums are very familiar with, it refers to the emotional and psychological experience that many of us go through, where we feel guilty or anxious about aspects of our parenting, work-life balance, or decisions related to our children.

 

It can feel like a shadow that trails behind us; a silent companion woven into the fabric of our lives. It’s the echo of every decision, every choice, resonating with the question, “Am I doing enough for my child?”

 

From the moment we become mothers, we find ourselves navigating a maze of expectations, judgments, and comparisons. Society often paints an ideal image of the perfect mother, a portrait of selflessness and constant sacrifice. The pressure to live up to this ideal can feel suffocating at times.

 

Mum guilt is pervasive and sneaky, finding a way to seep into even the tiniest crevices of a mother’s heart. It creeps in when you are too tired to play, too swamped to attend a school event, or even when you just want a moment alone. It whispers, “You could do better,” even when you are giving your all.

 

Mainly, this feeling comes from societal expectations or perceived comparisons with other mothers along with pressure to be a “perfect” parent, and the desire to meet both personal and family needs.

 

Ironically, ‘mum guilt’ doesn’t just arise from societal pressures, but also from within. Us mothers often set impossibly high standards, aiming for a perfection that’s unattainable. Every mistake, no matter how small, can be amplified by a sense of personal failure. I think this is the key to why we don’t hear the phase ‘Dad Guilt’ anywhere nearly as often.

 

Historically, mothers have been traditionally expected to bear the primary responsibility for childcare and household duties, which can lead to a different set of pressures and guilt compared to fathers. In recent years, there has been a shift towards more equal parenting roles, but societal norms and expectations still contribute to the perception of “mum guilt” in distinct ways.

 

So come on, I would love to hear what have you felt guilty about with regard to your parenting recently and I wonder if your partner or husband would hold those same feelings of guilt?

Understanding Colic in Newborn Babies: Recognising the Five Tell-tale Signs

Welcoming a newborn into the world is an exciting and joyous occasion. However, for some parents, the arrival of colic can add a layer of stress and concern to this happy journey. Colic is a common condition that affects many infants, typically appearing within the first few weeks of life. Recognising the signs of colic is crucial for parents to understand and address this issue. Here are the five tell-tale signs of colic in newborn Babies:

1. Excessive Crying:

One of the hallmark signs of colic is excessive crying, often for no apparent reason. Infants with colic may cry for hours at a time, especially in the late afternoon or evening. The crying may be intense and inconsolable, leaving parents feeling helpless and worried.

2. Difficulty Soothing:

Newborns with colic can be remarkably challenging to soothe. Traditional comforting techniques like feeding, rocking, or swaddling might provide temporary relief, but the crying tends to resume shortly after. This difficulty in calming the baby is a frustrating aspect of dealing with colic.

3. Knees to Tummy:

Colicky babies often display a characteristic posture during episodes of discomfort. They may draw their knees up towards their tummy, clenching their little fists as they grimace in apparent discomfort. This behaviour is a clear indicator of colic-related discomfort.

4. Clenching Fists and Red Face:

Infants experiencing colic frequently clench their fists and have a flushed or red face during crying spells. These physical manifestations highlight the distress and discomfort they are going through, adding to the parents’ concern and worry.

5. Tummy Rumbles:

Audible tummy rumbles and gurgles are common occurrences in colicky babies. These noises often accompany the other signs and suggest that the baby is experiencing gastrointestinal discomfort, a significant component of colic.

Understanding these signs is crucial for parents, as it allows them to differentiate between normal crying and the signs of colic. If you suspect your newborn may have colic, it’s essential to consult with your GP. They can provide guidance, reassurance, and potential strategies to help manage colic and provide relief for both the baby and the family.

 

Colic can be challenging for both parents and infants, but being aware of these five signs can help identify and address this condition promptly. Patience, support, and professional advice are key in navigating this phase and ensuring the well-being of both the baby and the family. It is a great chance to chat to other parents if you are going though this so please join us at your local Adventure Babies where you will meet lots of other new parents with similarly aged babies.  

Ah, nurturing your little one to reach those precious developmental milestones is a thrilling and rewarding journey. Help your baby to meet these milestones ensures that they are on track with their growth and development. Here are our tips to help you support and encourage your baby’s growth and development:

 

Engage in Playtime:

Spend quality time playing with your baby. Use colourful toys, books, and interactive games to stimulate their senses and encourage exploration.

 

Encourage Tummy Time:

Place your baby on their tummy to help develop their neck, back, and shoulder muscles. Always supervise tummy time and gradually increase the duration as they grow.

 

Offer Lots of Interaction:

Engage in face-to-face interactions and maintain eye contact. Talk, sing, and make different facial expressions to encourage communication and social skills.

 

Provide a Safe Environment:

Ensure a safe and secure space for your baby to move around and explore. Baby-proof your home to prevent accidents and allow for unrestricted movement.

 

Promote Motor Skills:

Encourage reaching, grabbing, and grasping objects. Use toys that are appropriate for their age and developmental stage to improve their motor skills.

 

Read to Your Baby:

Reading aloud to your baby promotes language development and cognitive skills. Choose age-appropriate books with vibrant pictures and simple text.

 

Offer a Variety of Textures:

Let your baby touch different textures like soft blankets, bumpy toys, or smooth surfaces to enhance their sensory experiences.

 

Facilitate Movement:

Provide opportunities for your baby to move and explore, whether it’s through crawling, rolling, or reaching. Clear a safe area where they can move freely.

 

Encourage Exploration:

Allow your baby to explore their surroundings, whether it’s through reaching for objects, touching various surfaces, or listening to different sounds. You could always join your local Adventure Babies class! 

 

Maintain a Routine:

Establish a daily routine for feeding, napping, and playtime. Consistent routines provide a sense of security and structure for your baby.

 

Offer Balanced Nutrition:

Ensure your baby is receiving a nutritious and balanced diet suitable for their age. Consult a GP for guidance on appropriate foods and feeding schedules.

Get Regular Check-ups:

Schedule regular well-baby check-ups with your GP or health visitor. They will monitor your baby’s growth and development and provide guidance based on their progress.

 

Celebrate Progress:

Celebrate each milestone your baby achieves, no matter how small. Offer praise and encouragement to boost their confidence and motivation.

 

From their first adorable smile to their wobbly first steps, each milestone marks a step forward in their journey towards independence and understanding the world around them. Meeting developmental milestones is a clear indication that your baby is in good health, if there are delays or deviations, early detection can be crucial. It allows for timely interventions, which might make a significant difference in their overall development.

 

Remember, every baby develops at their own pace. Be patient, provide love, and create a stimulating environment that encourages growth and exploration.

During hot weather, it’s important to ensure that your baby sleeps comfortably and safely. Here are some recommendations for what your baby should sleep in during hot weather:

1. Light and Breathable Clothing: Dress your baby in light, breathable clothing made of natural fabrics like cotton. Avoid overdressing and keep the clothing loose-fitting to allow air circulation.
2. Sleep Sack: Instead of heavy blankets, consider using a lightweight sleep sack that is appropriate for the temperature. Make sure it’s not too tight and allows your baby to move their hips comfortably.
3. Fan or Air Conditioning: If you have access to air conditioning or a fan, use it to maintain a comfortable sleeping environment. Just make sure the baby isn’t placed directly in front of a fan or exposed to a chilly AC draft.
4. Adjust Room Temperature: Keep the room at a comfortable temperature. It’s generally recommended to keep the room between 16-20°C for a baby’s sleep. Use a thermometer to monitor the temperature and ensure it’s not too hot or too cold.
5. Cot Placement: Place the cot away from direct sunlight and heat sources. If your baby’s room gets a lot of sunlight, consider using blackout curtains to keep the room cooler.
6. Hydration: If your baby is breastfeeding or formula feeding, ensure they are well-hydrated during hot weather. Breast milk or formula provides the necessary hydration. If your baby is older and consuming solid foods, you can offer water in small amounts as well.
7. Check for Overheating: Regularly check your baby to make sure they are not overheating. Feel their neck or back to see if they are too warm. Sweating excessively or having flushed skin can be signs of overheating.
8. Skip Extra Bedding: Avoid using unnecessary bedding like thick blankets, pillows, or stuffed animals in the crib. These items can increase the risk of overheating.
9. Skin-to-Skin Contact: Consider having skin-to-skin contact with your baby for short periods of time. This helps regulate their body temperature and creates a sense of comfort.
10. Nap Time Locations: If the baby’s room is too hot during the day, consider having them nap in a cooler room or even in a well-ventilated pram. Just ensure they are supervised at all times.

Always prioritize your baby’s safety and comfort. If you’re unsure about how to dress your baby or how to create a safe sleep environment, you can consult with your GP for personalised guidance based on your baby’s age and health. Or chat to your local Adventure Babies team about how to keep your baby comfortable in this hot weather. 

 

Encouraging your baby to reach out and grasp objects is beneficial for your baby’s  development in several ways:

Fine motor skills: Grasping objects helps babies develop their fine motor skills, which involve the coordination of small muscles, such as those in their fingers and hands. As they practice reaching and grasping, they learn to control their movements and develop greater precision and dexterity.

Hand-eye coordination: When your baby reaches out and grasps an objects, they are required to coordinate their hand movements with their visual perception. This helps improve hand-eye coordination, as they learn to judge distances, align their hands correctly, and manipulate objects based on what they see.

Cognitive development: Grasping objects allows your baby to explore their environment and engage with the world around them. By reaching out and grabbing objects, they learn about cause and effect, as they realize that their actions can have an impact. They also begin to understand concepts such as object permanence, which is the understanding that objects continue to exist even when they are out of sight.

Sensory exploration: When your baby grasps objects, they experience different textures, shapes, and sizes, providing them with sensory stimulation. This sensory exploration helps them develop their tactile senses and enhances their understanding of the physical world.

Independence and self-confidence: As your baby learns to reach out and grasp objects, they gain a sense of independence and control over their surroundings. They become more self-reliant in satisfying their own curiosity and needs. This independence and mastery over their environment contribute to their overall self-confidence and motivation to explore and learn.

To encourage your baby’s development, Adventure Babies classes are filled with exciting resources and inviting activities delivered by well trained early years professionals.